How things change…
I have a favorite photo of my mom from over 20 years ago sitting right near my bedroom door where I see it all the time. She has been gone now for almost ten years and as I have looked at that photo, she has gotten younger and younger. Of course, it is me that is getting older, and as the years have gone on my perception of how she was in that photo have changed. I am now creeping up on the age she was in that photo.
Perception.
Periodically I come across older paintings that I was so proud of at the time that I now cringe a little bit inside when I see them. I guess that is a good thing. A sure sign of progress. We artists are like puppies…
“Look at me! Look at what a good boy I am! See what I did? See me wagging my tail? Jumping for you? Painting for you? Where is my praise?”
Sound familiar on Facebook? I rarely see someone post about the struggle or the sense of fulfillment they feel when they are only in the middle of working on something or how a painting is a secret joy even when it does not get finished. Nope- paintings are posted and then we want a pat on the head.
I am guilty too. It is fun getting positive feedback. But it can all be just noise. And pretty accolades do not make the work better. Time and work do.
Lots and lots of work.
So keep painting. For yourself. Not for a show or for an award. Although GOALS are great, they need to be collected along the way to something more permanent. Something that grows and changes and becomes tangible. A collective vision of years. Your years.
I have put paintings I once thought were wonderful and were once proudly hanging on my walls into boxes and they are now collecting dust. I think that is a true sign of improvement. What was once good is now held to a higher standard. And the paintings I am working on now I truly hope will get delegated to boxes in the future.
My perception will change.
I will have my favorite images, but I will hopefully grow past them and keep building on something more significant with each new painting. I wish that for you too.
That someday your paintings will wind up in boxes.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts
you betcha!
Love this blog. Or what ever you may call it. I have not always painted for me first. But now, I enjoy the process more than the product. I have only once or twice, love a painting I have completed. The problem with that it that if you succeed in doing exactly what you intended, tell the story you intended, used the colors, values and tones you intended, you are stuck for the very next one. For we learn and grow with each painting. You are back to the beginning. Your goal is to succeed the last miracle of sublime (insert the right word for you)! Just my POV.
perfect!!
Of course that is only my own perception. Hoping that you are well and finding peace. Stay safe.
hugs back at ya…
As a beginner, while still “untaught” I volunteered to paint St Paul…never eat anything bigger than your head…so each night I dragged my sick and sorry butt home I prayed from my heart to be able to transform this monstrous ife sized cartoon into an icon…next morning an amazing icon stared back at me…the angels did it!
😊
What a wonderful and insightfull post! How True…about the puppies!! And about that growth comes with time and work. How did you get so Smart so Young??
ha… hard knock life….
Wow this is such an uplifting message. I have lots of paintings in boxes that never made the walls but they were the stepping stones for the few that I’ve been brave enough to hang or show publicly.
They are important. They served a purpose. My kids never want me to destroy any of my work. When I moved a few years ago I started a huge pile of paintings and drawings to throw out. My daughter cried so hard I had to save them….. Well, most of them…..
I have a guest room closet that I call my “salon de refuse.” Old pastel masterpieces are hanging by paper clips from old wire hangers.
Someday I will have a nice big bonfire!
yay! do it~
I identify with unhanging as well as unframing and sometimes attempting to re-paint portions of the needy painting if I think that enough of it is worth trying to redeem. Regrettably, my stash of once filled frames is growing, and I find myself thinking about painting a new painting to fit the poor lonely frame (and glass) that is relegated to storage, collecting dust, and representing a lot of wasted money. This is hard to take for someone as frugal as myself. Do you ever paint a new painting specifically to fill a frame?
I’ve been thinking about perception, and I think it is true that not all perceptions are accurate or correct. Some people think the “6” is the correct number, and some think the “9” is the correct number, but both cannot be true. It is either a “6” or a “9.” Also, would you agree that very few people have the natural ability to accurately or correctly perceive an object or a photo — to perceive it the way it actually and truly is? Lastly, do you think that even fewer people have the natural ability to correctly transfer an accurate perception to paper? These are just some thoughts and questions rolling around in my head, and I’m wondering what you would say.
hi. I think the opposite is true. It can be both a 6 and a 9. It is just a curve after all and how you view something makes all the difference. I think we all see things differently and that is what makes artists great. I am always amazed at when I am running a class with model how all the artist in the room see different things. Focus on different things. And that makes the work better and more interesting than if we all painted the same things the exact same way and exactly like nature presents it. Ho hum. I believe that no one can truly capture nature. We can only get close. How much do we want to beat ourselves up for “reality” is up to us I guess. And if the painting looks just like the photo? Then what was the point. Frame the photo then and go out for ice cream.
Ha! I like your last sentence. But for those who feel a strong urge to use their ability to paint in realistically, it’s almost discouraging, yet this pursuit is highly fulfilling for me. Yet, almost unfortunately, it is true that a great photo suffices, and for this reason I feel discouraged in my lack of ability to be loose and free while at the same time capturing the image. But I am trying to hang on to the hope that with help I can do that — hopefully soon.
I will be “abusing” you in the zoom classes soon- I can help!
I always appreciate your posts and insights, Christine. And I really appreciate and relate to this particular post. A few years ago I started throwing works in the trash and it was so rewarding….and freeing. I am always pleased when someone appreciates my work, however I am grateful that it doesn’t drive me.
good for you!
One of my favourite quotes but I can’t remember who said it, “your work today in five years will look like child’s play. Strive to make it so.”
The longer I paint, the more I see it!
And that is an encouraging thing.
Yes, my mother died at 61 when I was 40. Now I am 70 and she seemed so young. But no matter how old, it is too soon to lose a mother.
Thanks for sharing your vulnerability.
amen– we are never ready to lose our moms. So glad I had a great one.